When Winter Hinders Jogging, There’s Always Feline Blogging

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There must be a computer out here somewhere, says I, Misty the cat. (Photo by Laurel Cummins.)

Misty the cat here, back for my every-two-month guest post that I’ll continue writing as soon as I grab the hyphens from this sentence and sell them on eBay.

I’m still annoyed at my humans Dave, Laurel, and Maria for leaving me to take a January 5-12 trip to Guatemala, where teen peep Maria was born. I was alone for seven nights: One Hundred Years of Solitude, minus 99 years and 51 weeks. Fortunately, a nice sitter visited three times a day to feed me and administer my asthma inhaler — which I’ll have another dose of this afternoon after I click on the Merriam-Webster website to see what the word “administer” means.

Dave is not a Kindle user, so he visited the library January 2 to take out six paperbacks to bring to Central America along with a wallet full of quetzals — the Guatemala currency that rhymes with pretzels but is baked with less salt. Those small-sized paperbacks helped keep Dave’s luggage light enough to avoid the plane being overloaded to the point of having to make an emergency landing in Narnia, the magical world authors C.S. Lewis and Mary Higgins Clark visited during their famous early-19th-century Lewis and Clark Expedition.

The six novels for plane and non-plane travel reading included Pearl S. Buck’s classic The Good Earth — which Dave discussed last week — as well as Michael Crichton’s Jurassic Park and four of Sue Grafton’s 25 “alphabet mysteries” starring the very relatable private investigator Kinsey Millhone. None of that series of Grafton novels included C is for Cat, F is for Feline, K is for Kitty, or S is for Servemefoodnowornomoreunpaidguestblogging, but that’s (l is for) life.

Anyway, Dave thought Jurassic Park was good but not great. Fantastic premise in terms of the hubris to use prehistoric dinosaur DNA to bring those creatures back to life in the 20th century, and some very suspenseful moments, but the characters were mostly two-dimensional and the writing not much more than adequate. Plus, where was Barney the Purple Dinosaur? Maybe in the Jurassic Park movie.

Dave tells me the four Grafton novels (E is for Evidence, G is for Gumshoe, H is for Homicide, and I is for Innocent) he read on the trip were all absorbing, even though absorption wasn’t necessary due to it being the dry season in Guatemala. I’m also told that Dave read the first four “alphabet mysteries” years ago, and plans to get to the post-“I” ones before the aforementioned Lewis and Clark Expedition ends.

Soon after returning to New Jersey the night of January 12, Dave read Lee Child and Andrew Child’s latest Jack Reacher novel: Exit Strategy, which would have come in handy when he, Laurel, and Maria were trying to get out of the airport terminal in Newark, New Jersey. The book was okay. Dave is a big fan of the Reacher series, but things have gone downhill somewhat now that Lee Child doesn’t write the novels solo and now that 30 books have been published since 1997. There are only so many plots, as any cemetery director would tell you.

I, Misty the cat, have a favorite Reacher novel: 61 Hours, which is the amount of time I sleep every day.

Dave will reply to comments as I look out the window at dinosaurs. They’re big.

I, Misty the cat say: “Still too much snow outside to take a walk, but this bed seems to be shoveled.”

Dave’s comedic 2024 book — the part-factual/part-fictional/not-a-children’s-work Misty the Cat…Unleashed — is described and can be purchased on Amazon in paperback or on Kindle. It’s feline-narrated! (And Amazon reviews are welcome. 🙂 )

This 90-second promo video for the book features a talking cat: 🙂

Dave is also the author of a 2017 literary-trivia book…

…and a 2012 memoir that focuses on cartooning and more, including many encounters with celebrities.

In addition to this weekly blog, Dave writee the 2003-started/award-winning “Montclairvoyant” topical-humor column every Thursday for Montclair Local. The latest piece — about snow and more — is here.

32 thoughts on “When Winter Hinders Jogging, There’s Always Feline Blogging”

  1. I was reading two Reacher books and then stopped reading them because I found there was a too big spagat between his past as a military policeman and the ronin-vigilante protagonist in the books. In my experience, MP’s where the personification of The Book, and when they strayed away from it, they slid into crime (taking bribes for covering up minor infractions being the least of it: weapons, drugs, and diamants trafficking on the other end of the scale). But yeah, it’s a novel and people who don’t know too much about the military can get sucked into these well written tales.

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  3. Misty, we humans would appreciate the snow disappearing too. It’s pretty for a short time but it’s overstayed its welcome. And it’s too cold too.
    I’ve never read any of the alphabet mysteries, but I’m looking for a new series, so perhaps I should give them a try! (K)

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    • Thank you, Kerfe! Yes, this snow is indeed overstaying its welcome as the temperatures refuse to rise to anywhere close to 32 degrees (Fahrenheit).

      The Sue Grafton mysteries (starting with “A is for Alibi”) might not be fantastic but they’re quite good. I like the way private investigator Kinsey Millhone is very competent while also having plenty of self-doubt.

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  4. Well hello again, Misty; it doesn’t seem that long at all since you were last looking after things while Dave went off to enjoy himself elsewhere and left you home alone. Thank goodness you survived the experience and that Dave had the good sense to find excellent home help for you; it’s so hard to get the staff these days. I’m sure you weren’t upset at being left in the cold north while the rest of the family sunbathed in Guatamala; you’re a saint and no mistake. A good thing though that he let you check his reading matter for the trip, although I’m sure you could have found him superior texts had he asked you sooner – I read ‘Jurassic Park’ many years ago and agree with what you’ve said about it here. The family is lucky to have you, and no mistake. Here’s hoping you stay safe, warm and well-fed for the rest of the winter, and that you’ll be able to get out and police the neighbourhool when the better weather arrives. Best wishes to you. xxx

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    • Thank you, Laura! Loved your at-times-very-funny missive to Misty. “…you’re a saint and no mistake” — ha ha! 😂 Yes, I could have read some weightier stuff in Guatemala, but chose to go mostly vacation-time escapist (as in those “Jurassic Park” dinosaurs escaping their enclosures when the electric fences were turned off). Misty is definitely looking forward to resuming his duties as mayor of his apartment complex when the weather improves. 🙂

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      • Misty is a responsible governors of his territory so I’m not surprised he was champing at the bit to get back to his duties, Dave. I’m sure there were many interesting sights to see in Guatemala, so you did well to stick to mostly-lightweight literature for the duration. Hoping you’re well-settled back at home now, and that the year ahead brings some much-needed improvements to the world. Stay safe. 🙂

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    • Ha, Shehanne! 😂 Yes, that was very wrong of the staff. We have been told by Misty that there will be no cat treats for us until Valentine’s Day, when we can each have one treat shaped like a heart.

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    • Thank you, Dan! Misty is definitely antsy about being cooped up in our apartment during this weather. It does seem like it will be a bit warmer the next couple days, so maybe he’ll go out briefly. And he appreciates your use of the word “skinny” given that he’s 17 pounds. 🙂

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    • Thank you, Rosaliene! Misty was actually diagnosed with asthma back in 2018, so he’s had a two-times-a-day maintenance dose from his inhaler since then — including when we’re away. So, things have been under control for the past seven-plus years. The cat-sitter we use is a former vet tech skilled at giving the doses (as we are after doing it for a long time). Treats given immediately afterward make Misty very cooperative. 🙂

      Ha! 😂 Yes, more time for Misty to read, and be aware of the reading of others, with the extra time indoors.

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  11. Hello, Dave. I hope you had a great time in Guatemala. Fun to hear about what you read. I agree with you about the Jack Reacher books. The first ten or eleven were terrific, then they became so-so, and after the one about hunting people for sport, which I found both silly and bizarre, I just gave up. Haven’t read a single one since then. My favorite Michael Crichton is TIMELINE. It’s fascinating and exciting, about a group of 20th-century history graduate students who time-travel back to 14th-century France during the Hundred Years’ War to rescue their professor. Highly recommended!

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    • Thank you, Kim! Guatemala was memorable. 🙂

      Yes, a shame about the Reacher novels, though I loved perhaps a few more than you did — maybe the first 20 or so. (I do agree that the first dozen or so were the best.) I still somewhat like even the recent ones, and perhaps it’s inevitable that a series with that many books will eventually go downhill.

      I read “Timeline” a year or two ago (perhaps you recommended it 🙂 ) and agree that it was excellent!

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